Category: Blog Posts

There are some things you may know about me and some you don’t.

I am sure you know I have a new book, Coach to Coach, that is about to hit shelves and stands in March.

I am not sure if you know I am allergic to dogs.

As you can imagine, growing up wasn’t always as fun as a result of this allergy.  There were a lot of kid’s houses I couldn’t visit and sleep overs that were missed.  There were also a lot of holidays that were cut short because of my wheezing and puffed up eyes that would always come along with an aunt’s, uncle’s or friend-of-the-family’s dog.

Now don’t get me wrong, even though dogs were like my Kryptonite, I really like dogs.  I actually wish I could own one too, but that isn’t in the cards for the Rooney Family (3 of my daughters are not allergic, but one is just like her dad).

Over the years, I have learned how to interact with dogs without having an allergic reaction.  One way to do this is to simply stay outside.  Another is to make sure that if I do pet a dog, I wash my hands immediately afterward or before touching my face.  By learning these “hacks” to my allergy, I have been able to enjoy some of the joys of being a dog owner without having to actually own one.

So, now when I get a chance to have some fun with dogs, I don’t miss it.

Recently, I had the opportunity to interact with three different dogs and learned three different lessons.  Each one is powerful and can change your life.

3 Dogs, 3 Lessons

Dog #1 Maverick

My friend Howard has a big German Shepherd.  He is one of the most energetic and powerful dogs I know.  And I also know this: If you have a ball to throw, he will be your best friend.  And not because he likes you; but because he is obsessed with catching or fetching that ball.  When I throw a lacrosse ball with him, sometimes Howard will fake him out with a false throw.  Maverick will not cease looking for the ball even when it isn’t there.  Then when Howard does give him the ball again, it is tough to get it back.

The lesson for you?

What is your lacrosse ball?

What I really mean is what are you obsessed with? What is something you will do anything to chase and won’t give up on until you possess it?  What is it that you will work so hard for once you have it and would take a German Shepherd to get you to release it? And I am not just talking about passion here.

Even passion will only get you so far.  Everyone is a little passionate about something.  The most successful people I know are not just passionate about what they do.  They are obsessed.  It consumes them and as a result they do the things it takes to be great that other people just won’t do.

When I need to blow off some steam, I go to the gym to train.  For the last 25 years, if I don’t do something in the gym at least 4-5 times per week, I don’t feel well.

In a way, you could say I am obsessed.

But over the last few months, I have realized I have an obsession that makes my workout schedule seem distracted at best.

My new book Coach to Coach has become my “lacrosse ball.”

I wanted to make a contribution using something I know that could make an ongoing difference.  I couldn’t stop chasing the idea until it was written.  I wouldn’t let it go until l had a publisher.  I latched down on famous people for testimonials and when I do get this book in my hands on March 1, it may take a German Shepherd to pry it from my hands.

Are you obsessed with anything right now?

What is your lacrosse ball?

Dog #2 Ace

My neighbor owns a border collie.  This dog, however, isn’t really my buddy like Maverick.  When I walk to get my kids at the bus stop, this dog will race to the other side of the street, stop and growl and relentlessly bark at me.  And I mean showing his teeth with aggression.  I never understood how he developed the discipline to stay on his side of the street instead of crossing to attack.  Then I found out that my neighbor had installed an “invisible fence.”  This  is a boundary that is created and will shock the dog if it tries to cross the invisible fence line.  My neighbor said that once the dog understood the boundaries and the potential pain that might come with crossing it, the dog never attempts to cross the street.  Even when the fence is off!

Another great lesson!

What about you?

What is your electric fence?

Do you have any invisible fences you are still minding that don’t exist anymore?  Is there an old

belief or limitation that is still holding you back?  The successful people I have met are always pushing their limits.  They are always extending their boundaries.  Even if it is occasionally painful at first.

I wanted to write Coach to Coach for a long time, but there were invisible fences holding me back.  I imagined I wasn’t a writer.  I didn’t think I could write an inspirational story that a publisher would be interested it.  I was stuck barking about this book I was going to write, but for a long time this bark had no bite.

I pushed my limits and it was a little bit painful.  When I wrote Coach to Coach, I pushed a new boundary by writing a coaching story instead of a textbook like I was used to.  The process of editing and marketing created more pain, but I kept moving forward in spite of it.  Even though there were times I started to not believe I could do it, I shut those invisible fences off and kept going.

Is there anything holding you back and what can you do to turn it off?

What is your electric fence?

Dog #3  JoJo

My dad has a half pug/half Jack Russell named JoJo.  Not long after I moved out of my parent’s house, they got him (my parents had to get rid of their pugs when I was born due to my allergies and I don’t think they ever really forgave me).  JoJo is the most loyal dog I have ever seen.  Not only does he actually keep my dad on schedule, but the minute my dad leaves the house without him, JoJo will howl like a wolf until he returns.  But the howling of loyalty is not the best lesson I got from JoJo.  It is about how he reacts to when he sees my dad or when he sees me or my kids.  He actually SMILES!  And when he does, his tail is always wagging too.  And because he gets excited about you, you get excited about him and he gets his belly scratched just like he planned.

Another great lesson.

What and who are you most enthusiastic about?

When you get excited about someone else, they have no choice but to be a little excited about you too.  So how about you?  Are you always smiling when you see the people you care about?  Are you always wagging your tail and showing the world what you are excited about?

JoJo Rooney Rule: Life favors the enthusiastic.

My new book Coach to Coach has a few chapters dedicated to one of the most important skills you can learn: enthusiasm.  To be a success, you have to be enthusiastic about others and the things you are spending your time on.

As you can probably tell by all my emails, my tail is always wagging when I am thinking about this new book.  And that is because I am so enthusiastic and excited to have you read and grow from it.

I hope this email inspires you to better understand yourself, but that it also gets you to take a chance on the book and get excited about it too.

You can order it here and learn about all the Free Bonuses and Specials I have until March 1st.  I promise it might give you the inspiration to pass through your invisible fence and chase that lacrosse ball you have been thinking about.

Yours in Strength

Martin

“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.” Martin Luther King Jr.

All the things that matter will eventually lead to the start of a great life if you add them up correctly.  It is all about the “interest” you receive when you let the things that matter “compound.”  When you think about the term “Compound Interest,” money probably comes to mind.

Speaking for another of the greatest minds of our time, Albert Einstein went as far to hint that compound interest is the most powerful force in the universe by saying:

“Compound interest is the 8^th wonder of the world. He who understands it, earns it; he who doesn’t, pays it.”

Yes, Compound Interest can be used to describe money.  If you are financially smart, invest your money wisely, and allow it to compound over time, you can watch it grow.

But now that I am releasing my latest book, Coach to Coach, I have seen there are other things that compound than just your money.  And after I explain them to you, you won’t have to be Martin Luther King Jr. or Albert Einstein to recognize they may be even more important. (And if you compound the items I have discovered correctly, you will probably end up with more money by default!)

I am releasing what I consider my greatest book, Coach to Coach.  It is a parable about the most impactful things I have learned not only for being a better coach, but also for a parent, spouse, teacher, teammate and person.

Get Your Copy and Special Pre-Sale Bonuses Here

And how did I learn these wonderful ideas?  Through Compound Interest!  And now looking back on my career, I realize none of this compounding had to do with investing in the stock market; all of it had to do with investing in myself and others.  And that type of compounding is what coaching is all about.

This may come as a surprise.  The book was actually easy for me to write.  Sound egotistical?  Wrong.

Before you start to believe I am over confident, here is the truth: Coach to Coach would have been the hardest thing in the world to write 20 years ago.  In fact, writing the book back then would have been impossible.

Why?  Because 20 years ago I had not yet acquired anything to compound upon to write it!

So what are all the things that have compounded over the last 20 years that made writing the book so easy now?

Here is a list of the things that have added up and accumulated over time to make Coach to Coach a reality:

All the thousands of books I read.

All the thousands of workouts I performed.

All the hundreds of seminars I attended.

All the hundreds of seminars I instructed.

All the years of coaching I received.

All the years of coaching sessions I taught.

All the hundreds of speeches I delivered.

All the hundreds of relationships I developed.

All the thousands of mistakes I made.

All the thousands of lessons I learned.

I do not write that list to impress you, but impress upon you all the things I have had to do in order to produce the new book.  But you see, I also like to think compounding isn’t just a long-term product of your “to-do” list, it also has to do with your “not-to-do” list too.

The list above are all the things I did over the last 20 years that have compounded to make me who I am am and gave me the ability and knowledge to write Coach to Coach.

But there are as many things I didn’t do over the last 20 years that have also compounded to make me who I am and gave me the time and energy to develop the ability, knowledge and relationships that went into writing Coach to Coach.

So, just like continually adding money to your investments will enhance it’s ability to compound, removing unwise spending habits or bad purchases can also enhance your nest egg as well.

And again, compounding is not just about your money.  The same idea holds true for the energy and time that you devote to areas of your life such as health, relationships, career and hobbies (like in my case, reading and writing.)  Enhancements in all of those areas will be due to the compounding of both the things you choose to do and not to do.

So, here is is another list of what has also compounded over the last 20 years to make Coach to Coach possible:

All the thousands of t.v. shows I skipped.

All the thousands of unhealthy meals I avoided.

All the harmful relationships I ended.

All the harmful drugs I never took.

All the hours of lines on which I didn’t wait.

All the hours of video games I didn’t play.

All the “fantasy” leagues I never joined.

All the “fantasy” social media I didn’t surf.

All the thousands of junk emails I deleted.

All the thousands of junk hours of screen time I missed.

So, your life will compound according to what you do and also what you don’t.  And at the end of all that compounding, you will have something to show the world whether you like it or not.  All of my do’s and don’ts finally added up to produce this one short book of which I am quite proud.

When you read it, I am hoping you will write me to deliver a complement most people eventually get when they have let a talent, skill or hard work compound over time:

“I can’t believe how good it is!”

Just like an athlete that does something you can’t believe.

Just like the musician that performs at a level you can’t believe.

Just like the businessman that has success you can believe.

But now that you understand the process, most great feats shouldn’t be that hard to believe at all.  Just like writing a best-selling book, the three feats above don’t start in a day.  What you see is simply the visible extraordinary end result.  What you don’t see the hidden ordinary hard work that compounded over decades to make the ordinary into extraordinary.  Here are 5 simple questions you can ask yourself today to start your journey toward future greatness:

What is a major area of your life that you would like to improve?

What is your “to do” list that is going to compound in the future?

What is your “not to do” list that is going to compound in the future?

What is going to be your compounded great work that people will be unable to believe?

What is the one thing you are going to start with today?

Whatever you are doing today is compounding in the future.  Make sure it is toward something positive that you really want. Twenty years from now is going to happen, you might as well do something now to make sure no one can believe what you do then!

Take a look at your schedule and make sure you are doing the right things that matter and avoiding the wrong ones so your energy and time will compound to give you what you will want in the future.

I hope one of the “good” things that is going to help you on your compounding journey is Coach to Coach.

“Good and evil increase at compound interest. That’s why the little decisions we make every day are of infinite importance.” – C. S. Lewis

Do the good thing and get Coach to Coach, if you like it, please recommend it to someone else.   That kind of compounding will create ripples to help a lot of people.

Get Your Copy and Special Pre-Sale Bonuses Here

My mission is to make a world of better coaches.  I believe with better coaches, many of the challenges facing us today can be overcome.

Coaching is a thing that matters.  And in order to make sure the world knows about Coach to Coach, I will not remain silent about it.

Yours in Strength,

Martin

P.S. If you want more inspiration and want to hear these emails come to life, check out my Into The Roar Podcast.

If you would like to find out how to have me present for your team or your business, click this link:

Get me to speak for your team!

In my last blog, I told you about my steps for overcoming the “No’s” you may receive in your life.

Yes, I shared the success story behind how I got famous people behind my new book Coach to Coach, but I also said something important that you may have missed:  Sometimes, no matter what you do, you are going to get some “No’s.”

Life, after all, is a series of rejections.

Your life, therefore, won’t be determined whether you get some rejections. The outcome will be a result of what you do after that rejection.

The successful people of the world didn’t get less rejection from life.  In fact, they often got a lot more.  They are often just a little more successful than the rest because they never gave up until they eventually succeeded.

Lesson:  Rejection is only final if you allow it be.

What do I know about rejection?  You might think because I have a new big book coming out with a top publishing house that my life is rejection-free.  Well, not only am I going to show you all the rejections I have received in my writing career, but also how I overcame them so you can learn to move on after the next rejection life throws at you.

Although you may be familiar with my first best-selling book Training For Warriors, you may not know it got a bunch of rejections before it ever found a major publisher.

In fact, the process of overcoming rejection after rejection for the book took almost three years until someone was finally interested in listening to what I believed the book could do.

During those two and a half years of rejection:

I was told I was nobody.

I was told my topic wasn’t interesting.

I was told there wasn’t an audience.

I was told I didn’t have a big enough platform.

I was told I wasn’t going to cut it as a writer.

I was rejected.

Then I was rejected again.

And again.

But I kept writing.

I kept believing.

And anytime I thought about giving up, I reminded myself there were a lot of authors who had experienced the same rejection until they had broken through.  In fact, when you look at the interesting “Author Rejection Halls of Fame” below, many of the top authors you may recognize, would never be household names (and a reason you had to read in high school!) if they had given up after the first 10 or 20 rejections!

Author Rejection Hall Of Fame (Part 1)

Carrie by Stephen King was rejected 30 times.  His wife actually pulled it out of the garbage after the 30th rejection and submitted it again to finally get a publisher!

Anne Frank’s amazing The Diary of a Young Girl was rejected 15 times.

A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle was rejected 26 times.  Did Oprah know that before she made the movie?

Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell was rejected 38 times.  Tell that to Scarlett O’Hara!

The original Chicken Soup for the Soul from Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen was rejected 144 times!  Imagine if they gave up at 100.

Just like the authors listed, for my original book, I didn’t give up.  I kept pushing and finally I got a publisher to believe in what I knew would work.   Training For Warriors was finally signed and published.

Finally after years of rejection:

I was told I was a somebody in my industry.

I was told I had an interesting concept.

I was told had a big enough audience.

I was told I had a large enough platform.

I was accepted.

Interesting fact: most books don’t sell 1,000 copies in their lifetime.  Now over 10 years of being an officially published author at a major publishing house, my books have sold almost 250,000 copies and as an author I am considered a winner.

So, I tried for a second book and guess what?

I GOT REJECTED AGAIN!

I was told my idea couldn’t be done.

I was told I wasn’t qualified.

I was told the project would cost to much.

I was rejected.

Then I was rejected again.

And again.

But I kept writing.

I kept believing.

Through the process, whenever I would think about giving up, I would remind myself of the other authors who kept going:

Author Rejection Hall Of Fame (Part 2)

One of my favorites from high school, Lord of the Flies by William Golding was rejected 20 times.

Joseph Heller’s Catch-22 was rejected 22 times. Sounds like irony to me!

Dr. Seuss’ first book, And To Think I Saw It On Mulberry Street was rejected 27 times.  I wonder if he had a poem for that experience!

John Grisham’s A Time to Kill took 28 rejections.  Sounds like he did have time to kill after all!

I kept pushing forward.  My second major book Ultimate Warrior Workouts not only got signed and led to a three-year project of me traveling around the world, but it also went on to be another Amazon best-seller too.  And because of that success, for my third book, I tried to cross over to a new audience.

And guess what?

I GOT REJECTED AGAIN!

I was told it wouldn’t work.

I was told I didn’t have traction with this audience.

I was told women didn’t want to be warriors.

I was rejected.

Then I was rejected again.

And again.

But I kept writing.

I kept believing.

Through the process, I would remind myself that if I wanted to be a writer, it was almost a rite of passage to experience rejection.  In fact, after learning the following, I started to believe you can’t consider yourself a successful writer if you haven’t first be rejected:

Author Rejection Hall Of Fame (Part 3)

Gertrude Stein submitted poems for an incredible 22 years before she finally got one published!

Robert M. Pirsig’s Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance was rejected 121 times.

George Orwell’s Animal Farm was rejected because “there is no market for animal stories in the USA.”   Two of my daughters have read it for school recently thanks to Orwell not giving up!

And the ultimate Rejection Hall of Fame inductee:

Then welfare recipient and now Billionaire J. K. Rowling’s Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone was rejected 12 times and she was told “not to quit her day job.”

If J.K. could do it, so could I!  So I kept pushing until Warrior Cardio became a reality and another best seller selling almost 50,000 copies and being printed in multiple languages.  And because of that success, this past year I wanted to do something new.  Something more impactful.   Something I had not done before.

And in order to sell my latest book Coach to Coach I had not forgotten all the lessons from my three previous series of rejections.

This time, I knew what “they” would say.

This time I imagined the rejections I would receive and wrote a 20 page proposal that overcame them.

This time, I had the book cover designed and finished.

And when I sent it all to the biggest publisher, this time THERE WERE NO REJECTIONS!

And the only reason was because I had learned to ignore the rejections I had received for the 20 years before.  A rejection is the stepping stone to success. The more you get, the more you learn.  The more you learn, the less chance you have of getting a rejection in the future.

Where is an area you have been rejected?

Did you let it stop you or are you going to keep going?

What rejections are you letting stop you?

Are you not smart enough?

Not strong enough?

Not talented enough?

Not rich enough?

Don’t have the education?

It’s not the right time?

You never did that before?

You had the wrong parents?

They are all lies and it is up to you if you are going to believe them.

But after 35 years of training, my strongest anatomy aren’t my biceps, it is my “thick skin.” How thick is your skin?   To help you thicken it, here is my simple 5- Step system for dealing with the next rejection that comes your way:

5 Steps To Becoming “Unstoppable”

1.   Anticipate there will be rejections.

2.   Develop solutions for the rejections you anticipate.

3.   When you get them, don’t let rejections stop you, let them teach you.

4.   Keep learning, keep going, keep believing and keep asking.

5.   If you get another rejection, start back at step 1.

Put those steps to work.  I dare you!  If you learned anything from my message and the stories of the authors above, the greatest thing you ever do might be right after you push forward in the face of your next rejection.

Next time you get rejected, don’t get upset.  Get excited.  The best is yet to come…

“Why do I talk about the benefits of failure? Simply because failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me.” – J.K. Rowling

Coach to Coach is my masterpiece.  Not just in writing, but in what I have learned about overcoming rejection.  After 20 years of writing and rejection, I know I finally got it right. I am not sure if Coach to Coach will be bigger than Harry Potter, but I know how you can help.

Please purchase a pre-sale copy or two at the link below.  And please tell a coach you know that could use it.

No rejections accepted!

How To Get Your Free Bonuses and Coaching Education

Yours In Strength,

Martin

P.S. If you want more inspiration and want to hear these emails come to life, check out my Into The Roar Podcast.

Do you want a better job?  Did you ask for it?

Do you want a better relationship with your family?  Did you ask for it?

Do you want more money?  Did you ask for it?

Bold Success Statement:  A lot of what you wish you had in your life may be missing because you were just too afraid to ask.

I have heard that most of the things you want are waiting for you on the other side of fear.  I have also heard that FEAR stands for “false evidence appearing real.”  So, if fear is what is holding you back and fear is something you made up in your head, one thing you should not be afraid of is asking for something you want!

Rooney Rule:  If you are going to stop chasing a dream because you got a “No,” at least make sure that “no” didn’t come from yourself.  At least get the “no” from someone else!

If you are a long-time reader of my work, you would probably conclude I am a positive guy.  I wish I could tell you I was always as positive as now, but that wasn’t the case when I was younger.  Whenever I gave myself a “no” when I was growing up, however, my mom always gave me a helpful reminder by saying, “If You Don’t Ask, You Don’t Get.”

Most people give themselves a “no” before they ever take a shot at asking for a “yes.”  And that little misstep is why most people never take the first step toward their biggest goals and dreams.

How do I know?  Because one of my biggest goals and dreams has just come true.  If you haven’t heard, I have a major book called Coach to Coach coming out with one of the biggest publishing houses in the world.  The book will be in stores and distributed around the globe.   And none of it would have happened if I listened to my internal “no’s” and stayed too fearful to ask for a “yes.”

The following is the story of how I learned to overcome some of the biggest “no’s” I have given myself in a long time.  And if you use the tips listed below, it can lead to your dreams coming true too.

Producing a major book is no joke.  It is actually a lot of painstaking work.  There are a number of steps from outlining, writing, selling the book, negotiating, editing, design and marketing that make producing a book such an arduous project it would be easier to give yourself a “no” before you ever get started.   

Over the whole year process of getting Coach to Coach completed, writing the book wasn’t the tough part.  The information in Coach to Coach had been sitting inside of me for years.  As I explained in my previous blog on Coaching Greatness, I just had to free myself up from the non-important things that were keeping me “busy.”  I never told myself I couldn’t write a book, so when I said “yes” to myself, I got down to business and wrote.

Getting a publisher wasn’t the tough part either.  I have had publishers before and wasn’t giving myself a “no” there.  I submitted my work without fear and they (Wiley Publishers) immediately recognized how good and relevant the book was and I was immediately signed to a book deal.  And man, was I happy to get a “yes” from the same publisher of Jon Gordon, Patrick Lencioni and the world-famous Dummies’ series!

Even the editing wasn’t tough enough to make me give myself a “no.”  I have spent so much time studying and writing over the last decade (and because of the thousands of mistakes during the editing of my previous books, articles, blogs and emails like this) so there wasn’t a lot to correct.  I didn’t say “no” to myself that I wasn’t a writer, and it was a real honor to have two editors tell me “yes” I was actually a pretty good one.

So where did I hit my first “no’s?”   Looking back, the hardest part of the year-long process to complete Coach to Coach was just a two-week span out of the whole year.  During these two weeks, I was initially paralyzed by all the “no’s” I was giving myself.  And ironically these “no’s” were stopping me from getting the most important “yes’s” to make my dream for the book complete.

Why did I revert back to giving myself a “no” before allowing someone else?  Because  I was challenged to get testimonials from famous coaches, authors and athletes of influence and only given two weeks to do it!  Since I didn’t even have the hard copy book to show anyone, the “no’s” came back fast and furious.  But I didn’t even wait for “no’s” from them. In addition to the fact I didn’t have a book to show off, I also gave myself a “no” because I was afraid people wouldn’t want to read a digital manuscript and of that they were too busy.

I forgot my mother’s advice and for a few days I did nothing.  I kept coming up with all the reasons that people would probably say “no.”  I kept finding reasons to give myself “no’s” before I asked anyone:

Coaches were busy and in season.

Authors don’t want to be rushed to read someone else work.

Athletes don’t want to be bothered.

Not only did I keep the list of “no’s” going, but I was also wasting days and running out of time.  What I wanted was on the other side of fear.  And I was paralyzed all because of False Evidence Appearing Real in my own head.

I am not proud to say this, but I even started to really cop out and play with the idea that I didn’t need any testimonials.  Maybe the book would be fine without them.

But that was when I remembered my mothers advice and used the antidote to fear: action.

I committed to at least ask and kept repeating “Don’t Ask, Don’t Get” to myself as I started sending out email requests.  Each one I sent increased my resolve.  With each email, I gained more power by realizing the worst someone could say was “no,” but that was better than never even taking a shot!

I started with the lowest hanging fruit with some of the athletes I have trained and coaches with whom I have worked.

And you know what?

They all not only said “yes,” but they were also happy to read the book and gave enthusiastic testimonials!  Getting some “yes’s” gave me confidence and then I decided to shoot for the moon.  I made a dream list of people and I went for it.

After a lot of emails and hours of phone conversations with amazing people, my fear actually turned into fun!  Along the way, some of my fears were confirmed:

Some coaches are “too busy.”

Not everyone feels like reading a book in a week.

There are people that don’t want to be bothered.

But I kept asking.  And I kept getting results.

Did I get a few “No’s?”  Of Course.  But I got far more “yes’s” and I couldn’t be more proud of the people who are behind the book.

Here are just a few of the people and the testimonials they sent.  Look at these names!  Every one of them would not have happened if I stayed too scared to ask for a “Yes.”

5 Steps To Get More “Yes’s” In Your Life

1.  Make A List Of What You Really Want

Before you can ever get a “yes” you have to decide what you want in the first place!  Make a list of the things you would really like to achieve.  And don’t start by giving yourself a “no” in terms of the size of the ask.  Shoot for the moon.  You might hit a star.

2.  Figure Out Who You Need To Ask

Once you know what it is you want, you need to make a list of the people who can help you to get it.  I have learned there is always someone out there with the power to “push the button” you need for help.  Make your list and don’t be afraid of the person.  They might just be honored to help you out.

3.  Figure Out How You Need To Ask

After you have the people you need, you have to determine what is the best way to contact them.  Is it just an email? A phone call or voice message?  Social media?  Whatever the method, you need to come up with the best way you believe to make a good impression.  And be sure that your contact is scripted and sharp.

4.  Stop Listening To Your Own “No’s”

Now that you have your list and method, the toughest part will be overcoming your own fears and doubts.  They will try to get you to procrastinate or skip taking action on your goals.  Remember that your dreams are waiting on the other side of that “no” and if anyone is allowed to give you one, it is not you.

5.  Ask For What It Is You Want

The last step is the ask.  Push the send button.  Take a deep breath, dial the digits and call.  Whatever you do, don’t waffle or waver.  Be clear and ask.  And whether you get a “yes” or “no,” be thankful for their time and the power you will gain the next time you ask.  With repetition comes confidence!

The 5 steps above work.  But they will not work if you never take them.  And there are only two reasons why you won’t do it: You are either lazy or afraid.

And what is the antidote to both?  Taking action and simply asking for what you want.

Each time you overcome your fear, you get more courageous and then eventually do the hero’s deeds.  You can turn your fear into fun too!

Did it work every time?  No. I got some rejections, but once I was rolling, they only fired me up to do more!  Sometimes life is going to give you a “No.”  But as I found with all the great people that decided to promote and help my book, when you ask in the right way, you just might get a “yes!”

And if you would like to get more than one copy, here are some specials and discounts to make it an offer you can’t refuse:

Get Coach to Coach and some amazing Free Coaching Education Bonuses here!

Now for my big ask:  Will you please buy my book?

I am really hoping for a “yes!”

Thank you for getting the book,

Martin

Over the last few months, I have fielded a couple of common questions:

“What happened to all the emails of my latest adventures?”

‘When are there going to be some new Into the Roar podcasts?

My answer:  I needed a “break.”

By the end of this email I am sure my big explanation will have you as excited as I am about why I took my little “Sabbatical.”But first let me explain why I have seemed a little “distant.”

After 6 years of weekly emails and two years of weekly podcasts, I finally reached what I have often referred to as the most dangerous word in the English language:  Busy.

Yes, even me.

I had so much going on with my business and personal life that the additional hours a week I put into writing and podcasting were putting stress on me and my relationships.  I felt like I had something even bigger inside of me to share, but I never had the time to do anything about it.  So, instead of complaining (and yes, even I started with that!) I decided to see what I could do about it.

I started with taking a week off from blogging and podcasting.  To be honest, I felt like I was letting you and everyone else who followed my work down.  Quitting was hard.  Although it was difficult to quit the habits I had developed, you will learn today that quitting a few little things opened the door for something much greater.

But before my big reveal, let me ask you, “Have you completed the big goal that you know is waiting inside of you?”

If you are like most people, you might have answered, “No.” When I ask people why they haven’t reached their biggest goals or produced their greatest work, usually the answer is the same one I had: they are just too busy.

“I am too busy to work out.”

“I am too busy to spend time with my family.”

“I am too busy to get enough sleep.”

“I am too busy to eat right.”

“I am too busy to start on my big project.”

You might feel guilty giving those answers, but I know what you are talking about.  You know why?

Because my life had grown too busy too.

Seemed like I had made everything small in my life take importance over the big things.  I had a consumption problem and didn’t want to admit it.  And no, I am not talking about food or alcohol issues; yet my consumption problem was just as damaging for my health and family.  I was consuming too much of my time with distractions!

I had lost sight of what is important.  This inability to exactly decide how to consume information was consuming valuable time.  I was missing things my children were doing.  I didn’t have the time for what was most important.  Yes, even “Mr. Discipline and Productivity” was finding it harder to fit in his family and workouts.  Why?

Because all the little things in your life can block the big things from happening.

In order to get my life under control, I had to assess where I was spending my time.  I had to do what I now call my “Busy Inventory.”

I first detailed out my day where I was spending all my time.

Then I assessed what was the ROI on the time I was spending.

I didn’t like what I found.  I discovered a lot of time spent and not much to show for it.

Then I did a iPhone update and my findings got worse.

If you have an iPhone, and you have done a recent update, you may have found you can get a lot of data about your “screen time.”

After completing my “Busy Inventory,” I came to My Time Problem Diagnosis: My phone was consuming too much of my time.

Why?  Because I was making what could be one of the greatest mistakes you can make:  I let my NUNI take the place of my NUMI.

I was letting the Non Urgent Not Important things stop the Non Urgent Most Important things from happening.  And most of it had to do with my phone.  Although I made the initial excuses that my phone use was “all for work,” I knew had to be more efficient.  I was living like work was the thing of most importance and everything else happened if there was any time left.

Unfortunately, there didn’t seem to be much time left over at the end of each day.  Because I was “so busy,” I needed a drastic change.  I did 5 things that not only led to me feeling better, but also to my BIG ANNOUNCEMENT:

I have my new book called Coach to Coach coming out in March!

This book is the book I always wanted to write.  This is the book everyone was always asking me to write.  This is the book I consider my greatest and most impactful work.  Using my best material and coaching lessons from my last two decades working with top athletes and organizations, I wrote a coaching story.  Yes, that’s right!  I decided that since everyone always loved my stories, I would write a completely new story as a vehicle to teach my most important coaching and life lessons.

The publishers loved it and fast tracked it and the great news: you will be able to read it in March!  You can pre-order the book at the link below which will also tell you about some exciting special deals and bonuses worth up to $10,000!

COACH TO COACH BOOK PRE-ORDER SPECIALS AND BONUSES

Would you like to do something bigger?

Do you have a big project or great work still sitting inside of you?

Well my greatest work would never have happened if I couldn’t replace my NUNI with the NUMI things.  And once I found the time and stopped making the excuses, I sat down and did it!

Here is my 5-step process how I was able to make Coach to Coach happen:

5 Ways To Produce Your Greatest Work

1.  Cut Your “Screen Time”

The first step on my Sabbatical was to make the conscious effort to cut screen time.  This involved scheduling when I turned on and off my phone.  I found a bunch of hours a day that weren’t as busy as I thought.

Action Item:  Pick out times when your phone, computer and TV are going to be turned off.  Schedule your screen time and the things you will get done when the phone is powered down.

2.  Go Back To The Drawing Board

An ROI on my time proved I was putting out a lot of content.  It wasn’t that I didn’t love writing, but I wanted something evergreen and of bigger impact.  Blogs and posts aren’t lasting.  And the reason I was missing my NUMI was because I was too “busy” on the short term to work on the long term.  I decided to take a few months off from non-stop content creation and go to the drawing board that would help me create something more impactful.

Action Item:  Examine how you are spending your time.  Then label how much of that time is NUNI and NUMI.  Decide where you should be investing your time and make a list of the big things you want to do.

3.  Commit To Your W.I.N.’s. (What’s Important Now)

Once I had my list, I committed to spend more time with my family.  I coached my daughter’s high school track team, and made every meet and event for my other daughters too.  I got up with them in the morning before school and put them to bed at night.  I also committed to writing Coach to Coach.  The combination of the coaching lessons I learned and the importance of more time with family were the inspiration for my new book too.

Action Item:  Decide what are the NUMI you will go for each day and make the commitment to make them happen.

4.  Set The Time And Place Each Day

After the commitment, the next step was setting a schedule and environment.  I anchored myself to a time and place each day to work.  Instead of “waiting” to “feel” like working, I designated my desk at 9am each day as the place the work would be performed and uninterrupted with the phone off.  This lead to me knowing where and when I had to be to get done what I had committed to.

Action Item:  Decide on a time and place you are going to work on your NUMI and put it in your calendar.

5.  Do “Deep Work”

The final step was all about action;  I got down to the real work.  Coined by Georgetown professor Cal Newport, the concept of “deep work” refers to,“Professional activity performed in a state of distraction-free concentration that push your cognitive capabilities to their limit. These efforts create new value, improve your skill, and are hard to replicate.”  I did the deep work and the new book is the result.

Action Item:  With 1-4 in place, it is simply time to get working until your masterpiece is created.

Using the tips above, I was able to free up time for the important things in my life.

I am sorry I have been a little distant, but I had to take charge of my life.

The distractions had blurred the line between what was important and what wasn’t.

And by gaining clarity and then taking action on my W.I.N.’s I was able to create something even greater for you.

I hope you order Coach to Coach. Now that it is complete, I am happy to have a new NUMI: reconnecting with you!  Again, you can check out all the pre-sale specials and bonuses here:

GET YOUR COPY AND SAVE $1,000’s HERE

Over the next few weeks, I am going to be sharing all the lessons I learned from writing the book.  Not only will these lessons educate you, but I am also hoping they are going to help you produce your great work too!

Yours in Strength,

Martin

Coach,

If I asked you to name the top 20 basketball, football or baseball players of all time, I don’t think you would have a problem quickly rattling off a comprehensive list.  Granted your list might not be the same as everyone else’s, but I believe it wouldn’t be too difficult for you to come up with a bunch of names in a short period of time.

But what if I asked you to name the top 20 coaches of all time?  Do you think you could come up with a list just as fast as you did for the athletes?  I don’t. If you were lucky, maybe you might spit out a couple legendary names like Lombardi, Wooden, Gable, Jackson, Landry or Summit, but I am sure your pool of names would dry up pretty fast.   And if I asked you to name them according to sport, I bet your list would be even tougher to create.

And why did you select the names you did anyway?  Was it because their names are in the news or that their team won a recent championship?  

Well, regardless of how you selected the names, why is it that the list of great coaches seems so short?  One reason could be that while many athletes are born with attributes that made them great, a great coach requires much more than god-given skill.  Another could be perhaps that even though both the athlete and coach are ultimately there to succeed, a great coach is not there to garner recognition.  He or she instead takes pleasure in attaching victory solely the efforts of the athletes he or she coaches. Oftentimes athletes can be selfish, but a great coach, by definition, should not be.  As mentioned by Super Bowl MVP Phil Simms in the foreword of my new book Coach to Coach, the biggest and most overlooked reason that the greatest coaches are the ones you will never hear about is because these important men and women come along at a time in an athlete’s life when the spotlight is not yet shining on them.  The most important coaches are the ones giving all they have to the younger, developing athletes. And the tragic truth is that they usually get less credit than anyone. Instead of seeking great paydays and acclaim, these men and women coach because they love both the experience and the responsibility of turning a young athlete into more than they dreamed they could be.  Great coaching is a passion, not a paycheck.

Everyone is a Coach

I wrote the book Coach to Coach because I believe everyone is a coach.  Whether you are a parent teaching your child to ride a bike or swing a bat or giving a co-worker confidence before a big presentation, we are all coaches for someone.  To be a great coach is not just about the X’s and O’s of a sport, it is also about the ability to bring more out of a person than they thought they were capable. A coach is there to inspire and instill confidence in his or her players in order to do his or her most important job: to believe in these players when they don’t even believe in themselves.

For 8 years I was lucky to be part of an incredible team of great coaches.  Although you probably have never heard of them, these men helped to produce 8 NJ State Football titles, a 55-game winning streak and positively affected the lives of thousands of young men.  I have seen first-hand that these coaches are not inspired by a paycheck. In fact, if they were paid by the hour, they could have made more flipping burgers. They weren’t driven by money. They were driven by the passion to coach.  

In my years working with the team, the final game of my last season was perhaps the toughest challenge I have experienced as a coach.  Our team had again advanced to the New Jersey state title game and would get to compete in front of thousands on the field at Giants Stadium.  We were playing a team that boasted one of the top quarterbacks in the country. Both of those two facts were enough to place tremendous pressure on a high school athlete.  The fact we would also be playing the final game without 9 members of our starting team made that pressure incomprehensible.  

We were not expected to win.  In fact, the game was not expected to be remotely close.  Unlike any situation I had ever been involved with, these young players’ backs were against the wall under a tremendous amount of scrutiny and pressure.  Just five minutes before they were to leave the locker room, I was asked to say something to the kids. I knew I had to seize the opportunity to remind them that victory was not only possible, but probable.  The following is the video of that speech…

I did not show that speech to impress you, but to impress upon you that there are speeches like that going on every day in every sport at every school. There are great coaches out there making a difference daily.  And years later, athletes from that team still say the words I had for them have made an ongoing impact.  

We have all had both good and bad coaches.  The luckiest of us may have even had one that was great.  My question for you is, if you can agree that you are a coach, which coach do you want to be?

As you will learn from my book Coach to Coach and my Coaching Greatness programs on this website, I take the title “coach” very seriously.  Being called a coach carries a tremendous amount of responsibility that comes with the title. So many people are looking for guidance, motivation and someone to believe in them at a time when they believe in themselves the least.  The world needs more great coaches and it is my mission to do my part to help produce them.

The best coaches in the world aren’t just the ones being paid millions at top professional and college teams.  They can also be helping a kid you will never hear of through a tough time or saying the right thing at the right time to a friend that needed to hear it.  Coaches are in the trenches everywhere and regardless of their Win/Loss record, they are in a position to make a difference. Check out Coach to Coach and I promise you will not only have a greater appreciation of what it means to be a coach, but also a roadmap of things you need to do to make an even more positive impact.

Oh, and by the way, the Wayne Hills team won that game 15-12.  And I believe it had a lot to do with coaching… 

Coach,

To be more successful, a coach has to make other people more successful.

Over the last 10 years, I have presented around the world about coaching.  With my new book Coach to Coach coming out, I am being requested more than ever to share my favorite lessons. One weekend this past year taught me a number of great lessons about coaching and I only had to travel to Denver to do it (Denver, NC that is, which is only 15 minutes from my home!)

On that Saturday morning, I got up early and headed to the USA Powerlifting Fall Festival.  I had the usual nerves that come along with a powerlifting meet. Although I have competed in many meets, this one was unique.  At every other meet I have attended, I was always worried about myself. This day, however, I was concerned about someone else. This would be the first-ever meet I attended strictly to coach.  And I would be strictly coaching an athlete in his first-ever meet.

Meet Michael Soos.  At 53 years old, you might think it was a little late for him to enter his first powerlifting meet, but there is a story that led up to competing in Denver.  Although you could say his training for the meet started a few months ago, it actually started 3 years ago with a visit to his doctor.

What Was Your “Trigger Moment?”

For the last decade, Michael has been a “road warrior.”  His job at Prudential requires a lot of time in the car. And all those hours traveling in the car led to a lot of fast food.  That fast food led to excessive weight gain and a eventual trip to the doctor. That trip to the doctor led to tests that diagnosed bad blood levels, high blood pressure and to Michael’s dismay, diabetes.  

After the visit, Michael came home upset and was asked by his daughter to play soccer outside.  After only a few minutes, his heart was racing so fast, he went into his house, sat on his steps in a cold sweat and cried.  He knew he had to do something. With three adopted children, he was not the role model he wanted to be as a parent.

Enter my program, Training For Warriors.  Michael reached out to his friends for help.  His friend suggested TFW, a fitness program she too had just begun and was seeing results.  Although his travel schedule was difficult, he made the time to begin. He could barely make it through his first “workout.”  After the first few weeks of soreness and frustration, he gave up. His TFW coach actually went to his house, talked to him and got him back on in the gym!  Michael began again determined not to give up. At that time, we became friends, and he hasn’t looked back since.

In over three years since,  Michael has lost 74 pounds, added muscle and became such a standout in the entire TFW global network that he won the coveted Student of the Year award in 2017 voted on by all the TFW’s around the world.  Even with his crazy schedule he even found time to coach other beginners in the program too!

Once you push out of your comfort zone, it’s hard to stop.

Michael’s weight loss was amazing.  He was leaner, healthier (blood report was perfect) and running circles around his kids, but he wanted a new challenge.  Michael heard about the powerlifting meet and wanted to see how he could do against people his own age and weight. Because he never dreamed of lifting in a competition, he asked me for help.  Because I never dreamed he would be lifting in a competition, I said, “yes.”

In the few months that followed, Michael trained hard, ate well and focused for the meet.  Each week there were ups and downs that come along with serious training. I wasn’t completely sure how the meet was going to go, but I gave all I could.  During the training sessions, Michael probably thought he was the one that was doing all the “learning.” Little did he know I was getting the biggest coaching lessons of all.

10 Coaching Lessons From Martin Rooney

Lesson 1:  A coach should use his experience to make someone else’s better.

When I was asked to coach Michael, I knew I would have to invest time I didn’t particularly have available to help.  But I also knew I had a lot of hours invested in lifting and how to successfully compete at meets. How could I not use it to make him better?  To not be able to share that experience would have been to waste it. I accepted and put together a plan for training 3-4 days a week to prepare.  Over that training period, we tried to leave no stone unturned, and after all the work in the shadows, it was time to shine under the lights.

Lesson 2:  A coach has to get people to do the things they could never have done without him or her.

A powerlifting meet is a long and stressful day.  To go it alone would seriously hurt the opportunity to perform at your best.  I knew my job was to not only make sure he was relaxed, but also to do the “little things” so he wouldn’t have to.  I directed his warmups (the meet was over an hour behind schedule) and was there for last minute reminders on form and technique. 

Lesson 3:  A coach must be like a psychic.  He has to be better than everyone else at seeing the future.

At a meet, you have only 30 seconds to choose the weight you are going to lift.  If you miss, you cannot go back down to a lighter weight. With only three attempts at each lift, it is a tough call because you also don’t want to leave too much on the table or miss and not get the number you wanted.  Because of these facts, the coach must know his athlete and what they can do in that moment. I called the weights for Michael and he was crushing the meet. Until of course, adrenalin got the best of him and he decided not to listen.

Lesson 4:  A coach knows that losing will be the biggest teacher for winning.

After making his first two squats, Michael called for a higher weight than I suggested (I said 380, he decided on 389.)  He just barely missed at that weight and was obviously upset. Although he didn’t get the final squat, I let him know that error will teach more for next time than the lifts he successfully made.  He also admitted he learned you have to listen to your coach. 

Lesson 5:  A coach has to inspire people to do the things they may not believe they can do.

After successfully making good lifts on the squat and bench press, Michael had one lift remaining to do something special: the deadlift.  For this lift, I his coach knew two things:  One, this was his best lift.  Two, he needed to go for an all-time personal record to exceed his goal of 950 total pounds and get closer to his dream goal of 1000.  After he crushed his first two deadlifts, I was the one this time to call for a big weight. This time Michael listened to his coach and waited his turn to lift.

Lesson 6:  A coach must be a serial optimist.

When the people under his or her charge have doubt, the coach’s job is to believe.  I knew Michael had to be nervous, but as we stood in line waiting for his attempt, I kept filling his mind with positive thoughts and how I knew he was going to make the lift.  I only focused on what he needed to do to make it and did believe he was going to do it. Then, when he walked up to the bar loaded with 429.5 pounds in front of the hundreds in the crowd, there was no hesitation.  He did just as we had trained and in powerlifting terminology, he “smoked” it!

Lesson 7:  A coach is there to grow people and in doing so, grows him or herself.

When he saw the judges unanimously accepted his lift, he and I both let out a powerful yell.  He had not only hit a new all-time personal best in the deadlift, but with that lift, he exceeded his goal of 950 total pounds with 970 and took 3rd place overall in his age group and 4th place in the open division besting athletes that were much younger. As he left the platform, he wasn’t the only one that grew this day.  I grew as a coach and a person too.

Lesson 8: To a coach the real trophy is someone else’s.

Michael stepped up and hit that 429.5 deadlift.   When he got the third place medal (only top three got medals), I was so proud to see it around his neck.   But I was more proud he did his best when it meant the most. That medal reminded me I am not a good coach because I once pulled a lot in the deadlift. I was a good coach in this day because I pulled greatness out of someone else.  And as he wore that medal with pride, his result was my result that day too.

Lesson 9:  A coach’s goal is to be regarded by his or her people as someone who cares.

After the meet, Michael stood there with tears in his eyes.  He kept thanking me saying how my time was too important to “waste” on him as if I had nothing to gain from the experience.  I hope when he reads this that he will finally understand that little did he know I was a winner too. Why? Because I got the most important lesson and a reminder I needed:  I just love coaching.

Lesson 10:  A coach has to love to coach.

Whether you believe it or not, if you are a parent, husband or wife, business owner, teammate or friend, you are also a coach.

What do you love?

Are you using that gift and giving it away?

I have been told my gift is the use of storytelling to motivate others.  In my new book Coach to Coach, I use that gift to teach you how to be a better coach.  I hope you order the book and use the 10 lessons above to both see how you are doing and make someone’s life a little better today.

I promise there will be no better feeling when you do.  You might even let out a yell.

Want to know all my coaching secrets and help others reach their goals?

Raise your “Coaching Game” with Coaching Greatness

If you’d like to become a better coach, discover how to unlock the untapped potential in your clients and really separate yourself in your industry, my Coaching Greatness programs are your answer.

Yours in Strength,

Martin

Coach,

After over a decade of writing, I pride myself on not only having a better understand of grammar and punctuality, but also on the use of words as well.  In my new book Coach to Coach, I have put that understanding to the test to help create a simple parable designed to improve your coaching immediately.  During the yearlong process of bringing the book to life, I reflected on my last two decades of coaching lessons.

Want a secret to becoming a better coach?

All you need is to understand the difference between two prefixes!  

Over my career, I have had the luxury to personally coach and present to tens of thousands of people about the concept of coaching.  Those experiences have helped me to uncover this essence of coaching: The main purpose of a coach is to be there to offer encouragement!

Encourage is defined as to give support, confidence or hope to someone.  When a coach has done this, that person will gain more “courage” to take on the task at hand.  And the great news? Encouragement is not something you are born with or comes naturally, it is a skill you can develop. As you will discover when you take my “Encouragement Challenge” below, you can better encourage others and with practice, become a better coach. 

If you are reading this, you are a coach.  A coach is not just a person in a position of power on the sports field.  A coach can be a teacher, parent, spouse, boss, co-worker, friend and or family member.  In fact, everyone around you has the potential to be a great coach. The way this is done is by taking advantage of what I describe in my book Coach to Coach as the “coaching moments” that happen every day.  I wrote the book to make sure you never miss these moments to improve someone else’s life through encouragement. 

Before you go to my “Encouragement Class,” think back on your life.  Most of the great things you have done probably started with a little bit of encouragement from someone else.  Whether it was a parent, teacher or coach, I am sure someone said or did something to give you the strength to continue what you started.  Something you never forgot even until this day. Unfortunately, you can probably also remember some people from your past who held you back from your goals.  Both examples not only prove of the importance and power of a coach, but they should also remind you that you can greatly affect people’s courage just by understanding the difference between a two simple prefixes: en or dis.

Encouragement Class 101

The prefix “en” is an intensifier.  The prefix “dis” creates a negative, reversing force.  To understand how to become either a positive (ENcouraging) or negative (DIScouraging) coach, examine the two lists below.   In every interaction, every day, the choice is yours of which prefix is placed in front of your “courage.”

5 Best Ways To ENcourage 

1. Compliment
2. Listen 
3. Find The Positive
4. Search For Strengths
5. Smile

5 Worst Ways To DIScourage 

1. Criticize
2. Disregard
3. Find The Mistakes
4. Search For Weaknesses 
5. Frown

Now that you understand how the different prefixes lead to different actions, you first need to analyze which list you may be currently using.  If you find you are a little negative and your current responses require some upgrades, that is great news! With a little work using the first list above, you will enhance your encouragement skills to not only change the lives of others, but also your life too. 

The way you will apply numbers 1-4 of the list above will be with using words.  Great coaches recognize he or she has the power with a few choice words to better or worsen anyone’s day (or life!)  In order to give you a encouragement “cheat sheet,” here are two lists of phrases that are guaranteed to produce results.  Although each list only contains 15 words, depending on which list you choose could bring out or stop the greatness in someone else. 

5 DIScouraging Phrases

5. “You will never do it.”
6. “It can’t be done.”
7. “Waste of time.” 
8. “Not you.” 
9. “No.”

5 ENcouraging Phrases

5. “I know you’ll do it.” 
6. “I believe in you.” 
7. “Go for it.”
8. “You bet.”
9. “Yes.”

Take The Rooney Encouragement Challenge

As you will learn through coaching, little things can make a big difference.  Encouraging others is a skill. You have to work to develop it. That is why I created my 2-Part Encouragement Challenge.  For the next 7 days, challenge yourself to find a reason to give encouragement and practice the two steps below. After one week of hard work, your life will improve.

Step 1:  Print or write down the “5 Best Ways To ENcourage” list above. Keep them in your pocket or wallet.  See if you can check off all five steps in as many interactions as possible this week.

Step 2: Print or write down the list of “5 ENcouraging Phrases” above on the same piece of paper.  See how many times you can honestly use each phrase per day. Keep count until your skill becomes natural.

Do you need some encouragement?  You are sure to get it from either my Coach to Coach book one of my Coaching Greatness programs.  If you are interested in connecting with more people, these will make you the coach you wish to be.

I hope you learned something from the lists and take my challenge.  If you do I am sure you will learn encouragement is like food and the people around you were all starving for it.  

Yours In Strength,

Martin 

Coach,

Over the last 20 years, I have had the opportunity to coach a number of different teams.  In fact, there may be few people that have coached teams ranging from such a wide variety of levels in both age and ability.  You might believe that my experiences coaching NFL teams, world class fighters and special forces from the military would have been the most rewarding or exciting, but you would be incorrect.  Yes, it has been an honor to stand on NFL sidelines, corner fighters at the UFC and be behind the scenes with Navy SEALs, but my last season of coaching middle school track reminded me once again the enjoyment from coaching is not about the high level of the athlete.  Enjoyment from coaching is about raising the athlete to a higher level.

As I mention in my bio on the jacket of my new book Coach to Coach, some of my greatest coaching experiences have come from high school level and below.  Two years ago, I had the honor for the second year to help coach our town’s middle school track team. I was very excited about the season and knew the girl’s team was going to be strong with some returning athletes from the previous year.  

At the first practice, I made the girl’s team a promise that if they gave their best all season long, we would avenge our only loss from the previous season, finish as conference champs and go undefeated.  During the season, the team worked as hard as we asked them at practice and never questioned the difficulty of some of the races and events that were chosen for the individuals. Over the months we spent together, this team built fantastic chemistry and made it a treat for me to go to the track every day.  Week after week, the team dominated the competition. School records were broken and personal records were set at every meet. I had set expectations high for these girls and they were living right up to them.

Then came the final meet of the season.

I knew the girl’s were aware of what the meet represented.  If they could best the two teams (and one of our big rivals) it would be the perfect season I promised at that first practice.  In a meet that was rainy and cold, the teams battled. When the final scores were announced, our girl’s team exploded in cheers.  They had done it with another dominant performance winning the tri-meet 105 to 13 to 11.  

As we were taking our photos, I realized the season was perfect, but it was also over.  As I got a chance to reflect on the last few years, although those kids might think they learned some things from me that season, I also received a number of important lessons too.  I know as a coach I was there to grow them, but in the process of growing someone else, you grow yourself too. You may have been given the title of coach by someone higher up in an organization. In order to live up to the title, a coach “Has To” be a number of things to the people below them.  Here are 10 coaching lessons that I discovered that season at the track:

10 Things Every Coach “Has To” Do

1. A Coach has to be happy to be there.
2. A Coach has to set expectations high.
3. A Coach has to have tough standards and live up to them.
4. A Coach has to create an environment to bring out best in someone else.
5. A Coach has to be positive even when a student makes mistakes.
6. A Coach has to see possibility when a student thinks there is none.
7. A Coach has to see something in someone else they cannot yet see.
8. A Coach has to lift the team up and improve confidence and esteem.
9. A Coach has to ask the question each day, “How can I help?”
10. A Coach has to believe in them before they believe in you. 

That season was a great success.  We had an undefeated girl’s team and there were a number of records broken.  But as I look back on the season, I was taught the most important lesson:

For a coach, there is a difference between Success and Significance.  

Although we won the conference championship, I now understand that was not the most important thing I produced that year.  Championships get forgotten, but a significant impact you can make on someone else’s life by your words or deeds can last forever.  While coaching someone else, you just might be the person to create the belief someone needs to make a lasting change in his or her life. I hope over the course of the season, I said or did a couple things that will be significant to those kids for years to come.

Would you like to be more significant as a coach?  If you enjoyed the tips above, you will love my new book Coach to Coach and my Level 1 and 2 programs called Coaching Greatness.  Both can be found here on this website.

The list above should give you some insight how to become a better coach.  My wish is it also inspires you to take some time out of your schedule to serve others.  The last four seasons of carving out time to be down at the middle school and high school track reminded me that regardless of level or ability, I just love to coach.  I hope you spend some time discovering what it is you really love to do too.  

Yours in Strength,

Martin

Coach,

This past year, I committed to myself and my family to do half the traveling I usually do per year.  After the last decade of 30-50 trips per year, the big part of this decision was to spend more time coaching my 4 daughters.   In addition to freeing up time to be with them, I was also able to focus on writing my book Coach to Coach.  Although the book is a fictional coaching parable, the story was inspired by events from my life.  And when you read the book, you will see the main character starts off with trouble taking care of the “little things.”  Here is the true story from my life where I learned the coaching lessons to share in the book:

On the tri-weekly 30-minute drive back from swim practice with my second daughter, Kristina, I reflected on not only being there for the “little things” for your kids, but also how doing just one “little thing” can improve your relationships as both a parent and a coach.  Before I give you this “secret” coaching technique, I want to elaborate how the the last four years of swim meets and practices started.

During the Rio Olympics in August of 2016, my kids and I were glued to the television each evening to watch athletes from around the world attempt to make golden dreams come true.  Having once had an Olympic dream myself, I make it a point every four years to honor these athletes with my attention and celebrate the lesser known sports that finally get some exposure.  As a fan of all sports, I was inspired by Usain Bolt and Allyson Felix on the track, Simone Biles in gymnastics and the athletes of other less-promoted sports like wrestling, judo and weightlifting.   But each night, whether the venue was volleyball, rowing, cycling or fencing, my second daughter Kristina (who was not usually the biggest sporting fan in the house) was attracted to the swimming and diving.  Unlike herself, she kept talking about the swimming events and asking what I thought would happen that night in the pool. As we were on the couch watching Michael Phelps, Katie Ledecky and Katinka Hosszu winning medals, my then 10-year-old asked me a simple but impactful question, 

“Dad, do you think I could be good at swimming?”

It was one simple question that could have had a number of different answers. It would have been easier to immediately say something like, “No, I am not a great swimmer, so why would you be.”  Or I could have taken the realistic route and said, “swimming is so much work and takes so much time to be good, why would you want to do that?” It would have been easier to brush her off, but I paused and reminded myself in addition to being a parent, I am also a coach.  And as I have learned in the years since that simple conversation on the couch, a coach should never take away the most important thing a person with a dream can have: HOPE.

Although I consider myself athletic, when I get in a pool, I swim like a rock.  Not that I can’t swim, but as I got older and I guess more dense (my wife would agree on that one!) swimming really became a ton of work.  Add in the fact I gravitate to events that are shorter in nature and usually ground-based, I am not the guy who is going to go “swim 20 laps” for fun.  Regardless of my passion or lack thereof for the sport of swimming, I was faced with the question as my daughter waited anxiously for the answer.  

And now looking back on the four years since, I am so glad I had learned enough as a coach to always try to say the right thing at the right time.

So I looked down at that 10-year-old and said, “Yes, not only do I think you would be a great swimmer, but I know where we can get you some lessons!”  If you would have seen her smile, you would realized what I did in that moment. One of the best things you can do for your child (or someone you coach) is to let them know you BELIEVE in them.

A week later, she got in the pool for a “tryout” with a coach from Swim Mac, one of the top swimming programs in the US.  She was nervous and to be honest, so was I. As a parent, it is tough to have your kids evaluated, especially when you know they aren’t completely prepared.  

At the tryout, she actually did well!  She was placed into the middle level of the program and that started our three-time-a-week commute to and from the pool for an hour of practice.

Let me be honest: watching swim practice is not the most exciting pastime.  They swim down, get out of the pool, wait for some coaching, and then swim back.  Wash, rinse, repeat (pun intended). As a parent, you sit in the stands and watch the laps (and the hour) tick by.  As a coach to many athletes, it is hard for me to sit back and just watch. I wanted to be able to offer more to foster that hope and belief I had started.  But not knowing much about swimming, I thought it was out of my coaching realm. That is until I realized I had the best coaching tool to increase HOPE and BELIEF with me in those stands every day.

You see, each time my daughter would get out of the pool, she would hop out and immediately look up at me.  At first I thought she did this just to make sure I was watching. My eye contact showed that I was, but her responses showed me just being present wasn’t enough.  She, like most people, was looking for a little more approval or appreciation. So, as practices went on, when she would hop out after a strong lap and look up, I would give her the “THUMBS UP” sign.  Each time her smile was just like the one when I first answered her question.

The “THUMBS UP” signal has now become our routine.  After a good lap, with that little raise of the thumb, she gets a big boost in confidence.  It would be easier to look at my phone or read, but that isn’t what I am there for as a dad.  Now I am spending less time on planes, but am definitely spending more time in the car getting my kids to practices and lessons.  I wouldn’t trade those conversations in the car or that time watching from the stands.  

Maybe you aren’t a parent yet, or maybe you don’t think of yourself as a coach. I just want you to know everyone is a coach to someone else in some way.  If you work with others, you can be their coach. If you have family members or are part of a team, you can coach them up too. Now that you know you are a coach, here are three simple lessons you should have learned from my story how to do it: 

3 Simple Coaching Lessons:

1. One of the most important things to instill in a person with a dream: HOPE
2. One of the most important things to give a person with a dream: BELIEF
3. One of the most important things to support a person with a dream: THUMBS UP

Become known as someone that gives people HOPE and BELIEVES in others and you will be the most popular coach you know.  And how do I know this? Because I go to see one of the top swim coaches in American history live it!

Only a few months into my daughter’s training, the head of the program, David Marsh, who is one of the most decorated NCAA and Olympic swim coaches in the US, was walking into the swim center as we were walking out.  My daughter pointed him out and said to me he was a famous coach. Overhearing this, Coach Marsh told my daughter to stay right there as he went back out to his car. A minute later he returned with a Tokyo 2020 Olympic swim cap and as he gave it to her, he said keep working because he saw potential in her.  She never forgot that moment and neither did I. That is why when I was tasked to see what top coaches thought of my new book Coach to Coach, he was one of the first people to receive a copy.  

And when it gave it a shining testimonial, it was the second time he had given something to my family that I will never forget.

A coach has the power to change how a person thinks in an instant.  And those thoughts can lead to actions that can change a person’s destiny.  And what is some of the magic behind that power? HOPE and BELIEF.

My advice?  I HOPE you start today with a little “THUMBS UP” sign for someone you think might need it.  And trust me on this one, I BELIEVE everyone does.

Yours in Strength

Martin